I am that traditional, liturgical, historical-stuff is still cool kind of pastor. With that presupposition, imagine what goes through my mind when a young couple filled with zeal for nothing historical asks me if they can write their own wedding vows. “It will be really special,” they say. The reality is it will be really special if they gave up such an idea without having me waste my time in persuading them that it is an incredibly stupid idea. But they are young. And I have been gifted with the gift of patience. So, I tell them that there is a 99.9% chance they will regret this decision as they mature in their Christian walk and that I am God’s ambassador to keep them from joining that great number of disappointed married couples.
If you are reading this pondering whether you should write your own vows, ponder no longer. It is a horrible idea. There is a high likelihood that your youth pastor may even encourage you to write it out. He may even point to the old fashion vows as archaic. But by now you know better. Tell him, or better yet, give him a copy of an ancient Protestant wedding and tell him that you would like to use that ol’ fashion vow that reads:
“I, ___, take thee, ___, to be my wedded husband/wife, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part, according to God’s holy ordinance; and thereto I pledge thee my faith [or] pledge myself to you.”
Please do not allow the latest trend to minimize the reverence of a wedding ceremony. Wedding ceremonies are not a recent invention. The church has given it its highest respect. Honor it. Come with no innovation to it. Submit to it, enjoy it, and taste the seriousness and joy of your life together.